A day of Fulfillment and Disappointment

Woke up at 7 today, realising that everything that happened the past few days is over. And i have to move on my life. Went to the registrar, where i need to redo my ic, for loosing it the second time. Waited hours, cause server is down, decided to come back and left again at 2,Paid a RM50 fine, then went JPJ to redo my P lisense, RM20 Paid. Finally, all has ended, due to my own reckless attitude, and i have to take it to my own responsibility. Total loss: RM200

Although its an expensive lesson, all expenses paid by myself, but i'd felt the rush of achievement in my heart. Like i said, things come and go, for i shall learn to give things to gain things.

The next sad thing, not really sad though, was receiving a post from the PLKN, National Service lar.. Well, once i got it, i knew it would be a sad news. I knew i had to go back although i escaped NS for 11 out of 13 weeks. I guess someone is happy. Well, i don't know what reaction i could give, i was issued a certificate of training by my favourite commandant that moment. Now, the Chairman wants me to go back. Mum say don't care.

This is definitely a disappointment, the one thing i'd never regret coming back is being able to celebrate my love one's bday and to be able to be with, i'm more than happy. But, it seems that, i'd lost my love one when i got back, its already 5months now. I'd learned more things about that particular person, hurts when it isn't from its own mouth. A sad thing i would say. I was told to let go, i will, soon, but not now. Quote tsae yun : let the bygones be the bygones, you might loose someone you love... wouldn't want to type what she said later. I still do miss things...

Sis told me, don't keep it in your mind, for you will feel sad and depressed about the same matter, over and over again. I do agree with her, but.. it would never be easy. I'll try. Life is not only about living, suffering. We are created to overcome challenges, for only this will make us grow. I would say, its a shame of myself, doing all silly things for the past few months, hurting love ones, and letting them go, chasing them away from my own life.

I have no right to judge others, for me, myself.. ain't perfect at all. I see weakness in people, so do they towards me. I realize i'm foolish to had all things ruin, making my love ones feel sad and depressed, leading them away from me. Well, too bad it cant be undone, for i shall prove that i can be better.

I hereby, *kneels down* ask for everyone's forgiveness, i'm sorry for all i'd done, since young. I realize it isn't easy to be a human, you get irritated, you irritate people. For i see now, i must learn to be nice and caring. For it says, DO UNTO OTHERS AS YOU WANT OTHERS TO DO UNTO YOU.

You know who you are.. you know what i want to say, and in additional to all my expressions towards you? I 'm sorry. Happiness to both of you. i'll stay happy too. My friends and sis is supporting me good. Thanks to all who'd cheeered me up when i was down. Arigatoz.