I am always being afraid to change because i fear of words.. because i'd always promised people that i will care for them, for the rest of my life and etc.. and i meant it. I commit myself to it, and i even walk the talk.

But as time goes by, environments change, people change. So i wonder if i should too. If i change, would you people say i did not keep my words? I'm in a dilemma

Why am i giving in still, when there isnt a need anymore. Its like paying over a cup of coffee that you did not order, or paying for a rotten pack of rice you'd just ta-paoed.

Its not that i'm unwilling to, but sometimes you get tired of things. No matter how much you cared about, and how willing you are... sometimes it doesn't really matter eii.

Of course people have not changed.. some claimed.. but towards certain people, hell you did..wkakakakaa.. Nevermind.. i'm just wasting my time here so i could calm myself down and act normal again. I guess sometimes patching up my life is better then patching up friendships.
Cause when people don't need you, and you still wanna care, like my sis say, selling a fridge to eskimos. or a floppy disk in today's era (she's good i tell you)

hahahahaha
Move on dude. Life has never been better, and it had never gone worst. You've gotta hit yourself in the head that its not worth it anymore. (i'd been telling myself for years and still i'm not done with it)

But i can say, i think its still worthy doing all this. Because i appreciate you. You who was once there for me, you who once cared for me like a sister, like a best friend. Last time, if i'm not ok, your name appears on my phone screen immediately... last time, when i am unhappy, you would know, and be there for me. Now? A few messages bore you.. and the focus has shifted. Hahahaha.. but it doesn't change what has happen in the past.. It was given to me and i treasure it... till now

I guess its time for me to focus on those who has been waiting for me, for years. I think they deserve something from me. Change is inevitable but it can be prolonged